Rhett and Link The Coffee Shop song lyrics

Hi. My name is (Bard?) and this is my friend John

Thanks for having us out at your open mic night tonight at the Holy Grounds Cafe

One thing to note, my friend John is a master recordist

There's a guy in the corner in my favorite seat

The cushiony one where I sink real deep

He's gonna be there a while but he'll have to pee

Would it be too awkward for him to return and see me

In the cushiony seat?

They got a lot a Guatemalan shade grown deep in the jungle zone

And naturally decaffeinated Colombian

French Roast floats on a boat from Costa Rica

To be brewed by Sue

The underpaid barista

To buy a muffin or a scone

I'd have to take out a home equity loan

So I'll just stick with my latte and ask

What is biscotti?

At the coffee shop

A place where I can go

To sit and drink coffee

The coffee shop

A place where I can talk

To people or be quiet

An all around great place that has

Coffee!

Well, I'll take a small

Well a small's a Tall

And a medium we call Grande

Since a small and a medium both sound big

Our word for large is Vante

Isn't it Venti?

Well it's plenty

Now don't you want any?

Of course I do

What's your freshest brew?

Jamaica Blue

Blue?

Blue

Blue?

Blue

Blue?

Blue

I'll take two. Thank you

But where's your cream and sugar?

Did you just call me sugar?

...No

The cream and sugar's over there (Ah yes)

Behind the glass case containing a pair

Of Ralph Nader's biodegradable underwear

At my coffee shop

A place where I can go

To sit and drink coffee

The coffee shop

A place where I can talk

To people or be quiet

An all around great place that has

Coffee?

Y... Yeah

Coffee.